
What does failure look like for gifted children? Gifted children often do not experience failure as early as age-peers setting them up to lack skills to deal with failure when it eventually occurs. Failure for gifted children goes beyond failing grades. It can look like less than perfect academic performance, experiencing disappointment shown by parents and teachers, and mistakes in class. It can manifest as frustration, self-doubt, underachievement, avoidance behavior, or diminished classroom participation.
Early on, many GT students are successful in almost everything they try because they are underchallenged and thus become failure-avoidant (NAGC). When they reach middle/high school, they may not have learned how to study or complete assignments at home leading them to doubt their abilities. Asynchrony and poor Executive Function skills may cause them to become overwhelmed and confused regarding their path forward.
How can perfectionism lead to failure? When a gifted student seeks perfection, they may avoid challenges and risk-taking in order to avoid perceived failure. Perfectionism can lead these students to become introverts or experience poor social interactions with peers. When gifted students experience the negative aspects of perfectionism, anxiety, procrastination, and dissatisfaction with their work can all lead to failure.
What strategies can help students rebound from failure? GT students need to be taught the need for and value of hard work and persistence. This requires these students to be presented with challenging work. Learning how to problem solve through open-ended and challenging material can help students cope with frustration, ask for help, evaluate ideas, and move on after failure. Strategies to help rebound from failure include modeling coping strategies, building skill sets, dissecting challenging assignments, and tempering expectations.
What lessons can gifted children learn from failure? Longtime #gtchat participant, Jerry Blumengarten, often tweets: FAIL = First Attempt in Learning. This is certainly true for GT learners. When failure happens, gifted children can learn the value of their mistakes and how to separate failure from their own identity. Resilience in an important lesson to be learned from failure – how to absorb disappointment, gain confidence in one’s decision-making ability, and accept responsibility (NAGC).
A transcript of this chat can be found at Wakelet.
Global #gtchat Powered by the Texas Association for the Gifted and Talented is a weekly chat on Twitter. Join us Thursdays at 8E/7C/6M/5P in the U.S. and Fridays at 1AM GMT to discuss current topics in the gifted community and meet experts in the field. Transcripts of our weekly chats can be found at Wakelet. Our Facebook Page provides information on the chat and news and information regarding the gifted community.
About the author: Lisa Conrad is the Moderator of Global #gtchat Powered by TAGT and Social Media Manager of the Global #gtchat Community. She is a longtime advocate for gifted children and also blogs at Gifted Parenting Support. Lisa can be contacted at: gtchatmod@gmail.com
Resources:
Teaching Your Child to Fail | NAGC
Why Do Gifted Students Often Struggle in School?
Underachievement in Gifted Students | Davidson Academy
Tips for Parents: Doing Poorly on Purpose: Underachievement and the Quest for Dignity | Davidson Institute
Doing Poorly on Purpose: Strategies to Reverse Underachievement and Respect Student Dignity (book)
A Life Lesson for Gifted Children: Failure | Dr. Gail Post
Fear Of Failure: The Paranoia Of Academically Gifted Students (pdf)
Why Gifted Children Fail and How to Prevent It
When the ‘gifted’ kids aren’t all right
Gifted and Talented Students at Risk
The Stress of Being Gifted and Talented
6 Ways to Help Your Child Overcome the Fear of Failure
Why Getting 100% On Everything Is Setting Gifted Students Up To Fail
5 Common Problems Experienced By Gifted Children & Adolescents
Cybraryman’s Learning from Mistakes Page
How to help my gifted child who has to be perfect (YouTube 4:32)
Graphic courtesy of Lisa Conrad.