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Optimizing Asynchronous Development

The term asynchronous development was originally conceptualized by a group known as the Columbus Group. It is widely accepted today relating to gifted children. The Columbus Group defined asynchronous development as children whose inner experiences and awareness due to intellect and intensities were qualitatively different from the norm. They believed parenting, teaching and counseling required modifications in order for gifted children to develop optimally.

It is important to understand giftedness through the lens of asynchronous development. Initially, gifted children may not comprehend the role of asynchronous development in their lives on a very personal level. They need guidance. Society’s expectations of how a child should act and how a smart child should act put undue pressure on these kids that can have severe consequences for them and society.

There are paradoxes presented by asynchronous development. It can, but not in all cases, mean a child can achieve at levels well beyond what is expected for their chronological age. Asynchronous development may result in a child being placed in an academically appropriate place that fails to accommodate their social-emotional needs.

How does asynchronous development affect the behavioral and emotional aspects of giftedness? Once a child is identified as gifted, society tends to judge them solely on their achievements and how they perform without regard to social-emotional aspects. It can create a wildly different life experience for the gifted child; one that lacks the understanding and empathy of adults.

Adults can support a gifted child’s asynchronous development so that they aren’t overwhelmed by their ability to perceive the complexity of the world around them. Ideally, a gifted child’s social-emotional needs will be respected in conjunction with their gifts and talents. Recognizing the need is a good first step. Adults need to be hyper-aware of each gifted child’s unique challenges and develop individualized education plans that address the whole child.

Where can parents seek information about asynchronous development? One of the best books for parents is “Off the Charts.” It’s a compilation of works; many by members of the Columbus Group. The NAGC, SENG and IEA Gifted have extensive resources for parents seeking information on asynchronous development. State organizations may have additional local info as well. A transcript of this chat may be found at Wakelet.

Global #gtchat Powered by the Texas Association for the Gifted and Talented is a weekly chat on Twitter. Join us Thursdays at 8E/7C/6M/5P in the U.S. and Fridays at Noon NZST/10 AM AEST/1 AM UK to discuss current topics in the gifted community and meet experts in the field. Transcripts of our weekly chats can be found at Wakelet. Our Facebook Page provides information on the chat and news and information regarding the gifted community. Also, checkout our Pinterest Page and Playlist on YouTube.

About the author: Lisa Conrad is the Moderator of Global #gtchat Powered by TAGT and Social Media Manager of the Global #gtchat Community. She is a longtime advocate for gifted children and also blogs at Gifted Parenting Support. Lisa can be contacted at: gtchatmod@gmail.com

Links:

Off the Charts: Asynchrony and the Gifted Child (Amazon)

Definition of Asynchronous Development in Children

Asynchronous Development: An Alternate View of Giftedness

Asynchronous Development in Gifted Kids

Many Ages at Once

The Neural Plasticity of Giftedness

Giftedness: The View from Within

Asynchronous Development

Asynchronous Development (NAGC)

UK: The Misidentification & Misdiagnosis of Gifted Children

Gifted Children Do Exist Here’s What Happen when We Deny It

What I Want You to Know about My Gifted Son

Supporting Gifted Children

Parent Hot Sheet: Asynchronous Development (pdf) (NAGC)

Life in the Asynchronous Family

Asynchronous Development

The Columbus Group

Sprite’s Site: Beginning the Journey – Gifted 101

Giftedness As Asynchronous Development

4 Fabulous Ways for Kids to Pamper Mom on Mother’s Day

Image courtesy of Pixabay CC0 Public Domain

Graphic courtesy of Lisa Conrad

Sibling Rivalry in Gifted Families

May 6

Posted by gtchatmod

ALL children need to feel valued regardless of ability. It is a delicate balancing act. Parents must often be there for siblings when one is identified for a particular gifted program and another one is not. Gifted rivalry is not accidental. It’s important to realize intentions and counseling siblings is an important parental responsibility. It can extend to the selection of colleges, participation in academic competitions and affect acceleration decisions.

What role does ‘asynchronous development’ play in gifted sibling rivalry? It can dramatically change a child’s place in the family; such as when a younger child surpasses an older sibling academically (think Young Sheldon). This can affect decisions about acceleration. Asynchronous development can ultimately cause excessive stress on parents who themselves may not be able to ‘keep up’ with their child’s intellectual progress. Younger children who are profoundly gifted may be confused or feel constrained by what they can do socially because of their chronological age.

To minimize sibling rivalries, parents can avoid comparisons, emphasize strengths, reminding child of their uniqueness, and not give more privileges to one child over the other. Furthermore, they can be minimized by not assuming that problems will arise, teaching ‘fair’ doesn’t mean equal, and remembering that not all strengths and talents are either academics or sports. Parents can try their best to spend quality time with each child; providing companionship and time alone with each one.

What can parents do to build positive and cooperative relationships in the gifted family? They can value their child’s point of view as a way to encourage cooperation and value the strengths and weaknesses of each child while acknowledging their differences.

Schools can offer resources to parents of gifted children with mixed abilities. They can suggest parents utilize school guidance counselors and enlist a favorite teacher when necessary to encourage a student to model good behavior at home. Finally, schools should maintain a positive parent-school relationship by offering resources to parents such as providing opportunities for gifted children to explore interests and passions. A transcript may be found at Wakelet.

Links:

When One Child Is Gifted: Avoiding Sibling Rivalry

How Gifted Children Impact the Family

A Gifted Child Increases Sibling Rivalry, Study Finds

The Effects of Sibling Competition

Comparing Gifted and Non-Gifted Sibling Perceptions of Family Relations (pdf 1982)

Gifted and Non-Gifted Siblings: How Conventional Wisdom is Wrong

The Social World of Gifted Children and Youth (pdf)

When One Sibling is More “Gifted” Than the Other

Tempo: Guidance & Counseling of Gifted Students

Life in the Asynchronous Family

Siblings of Twice-Exceptional Children

A Parent’s Guide to Gifted Children (Amazon)

Congrats, Your Kid is Gifted…But What About Her Sibling?

Keeping the Family Balance

Setting Boundaries for Gifted Siblings

Sibling Relationships in Families with Gifted Children (pdf)

Cybraryman’s Gifted and Talented Page

Image courtesy of Pixabay CC0 Public Domain

Graphic courtesy of Lisa Conrad

Posted in Acceleration, Asynchronous Development, Emotional Intelligence, Emotional intensity, family, Gifted Adults, gifted and talented, parenting, Parents

Best Ways to Support the Gifted Teen

Jun 22

Posted by gtchatmod

“OK . . . let’s be honest: you cannot force a reluctant teenager to do anything, at least not for long. Whether it’s to do more homework (or to not obsess about its completion); to begin to become more social (or to cut back on the dating circuit); or to start planning for one’s college future (or to forget thinking of Harvard in 8th grade), teens have their own personal agendas, many of which tie into their newly found senses of power and independence.” ~ Dr. James Delisle

The teen years can be some of the most daunting years for gifted children as well as their parents and teachers. Gifted, profoundly gifted (PG) and twice-exceptional (2E) teens face many challenges not experienced by their age-peers. They often face unreasonable expectations and mixed messages about their abilities from adults. Gifted teens can have a different view of life and the world than do their classmates. They may prefer to be with intellectual peers rather than age-peers.

There was no shortage of acknowledging challenges for gifted kids:

There is nothing without challenge. Except learning, but he will never learn the way they want him to anyway. ~ Mona Chicks
For us, I think the social and emotional issues are the biggest hurdles. ~Celi Trépanier
My daughter is GT and basketball player. Was told she can’t be smart and a jock.Cliques can cause issues. She changed minds. ~Jodi Foreman
Where to start? All of them. Peers, asynchrony, divergent interests, feeling more, BEING more. ~ Jen Merrill

We next turned our attention to asynchronous development as it had been mentioned several times at this point. Asynchronous development – many ages at once – can have a profound impact on their social lives. Jonathan Bolding, middle school teacher of gifted and talented students in Nashville, told us that an “inability to connect with same-age peers may lead to social isolation.” Although intellectually ready to handle more challenging academics, they may not be able to navigate the social scene as easily.

Our third question considered sleep deprivation … how do you get a gifted teen to turn off the lights? For the homeschoolers present, this did not seem as much of a problem as it did for those with kids in public schools where early starts to the day proved difficult for most teens. It was an issue that followed many teens into adulthood. Many suggestions were offered on ways to get a teen to sleep. According to Dr. Jim Delisle, “A gifted teen’s greatest enemy is lack of sleep. Sleep is often not considered a priority for gifted adolescents. Resultant crankiness, listlessness, general “unattractiveness” are a direct result of this lack of sleep. The teen mind is often in overdrive – try to find methods of relaxation.”

How best can adults support sensible risk-taking regarding education? Risk-taking is a huge component in creativity! Teens should not shy away from actions for fear of appearing ‘different’. They need to understand that being less than perfect is okay and not everyone is successful on the first attempt. (S. White) Learning to deal with failure and overcoming it are skills that can be learned during the teen years. Parents and teachers should both model how to cope with failure; be honest with their kids/students.

Many good strategies were discussed for developing self-advocacy in teens. Self-advocacy can be nurtured by allowing teens to experience natural consequences for their actions early on. Parents need to be less involved in ‘rescuing’ teens from academic issues and lend support to their teen. Jen Merrill suggested, “Start small. Encourage them to do things for themselves in public. Gradually work up to educational advocacy.”

The teen years can be a balancing act between ‘fitting in’ and intellectual authenticity with age-peers. It’s natural for teens to want to fit in with peer groups. Adults need to be understanding and give them some space to find their own way. Jeremy Bond, a parent, expressed it this way, “As with all teens, they should know you’ll always be there for support, but not to navigate things for them.” A transcript of this chat may be found at Storify.

This week, our sponsor GiftedandTalented.com gave away a scholarship for a 3-month subscription to their K-7 Math and Language Arts Combination Course. The winner was Virginia Pratt, a teacher of gifted and talented students in South Carolina. GiftedandTalented.com was born out of Stanford’s EPGY. EPGY was led by Professor Patrick Suppes and they are honored to continue his legacy. Virginia was able to answer the question – “During Patrick Suppes’ 64 years at Stanford, how many books did he publish?” (Answer: 34) Congratulations, Virginia and many thanks to GiftedandTalented.com!

Global #gtchat Powered by the Texas Association for the Gifted and Talented and sponsored by GiftedandTalented.com is a weekly chat on Twitter. Join us Fridays at 7E/6C/5M/4P in the U.S., Midnight in the UK and Saturdays 11 AM NZST/9 AM AEST to discuss current topics in the gifted community and meet experts in the field. Transcripts of our weekly chats can be found at Storify. Our Facebook Page provides information on the chat and news & information regarding the gifted community. Also, checkout our new Pinterest Page and Playlist on YouTube.

Links:

Tips for Parents: The Real World of Gifted Teens

Tips for Parents: Gifted . . . and Teenagers, too

10 Ways to Help Your Gifted Teen Get the Best Out of Secondary School

Parenting Gifted Teens

Parenting Gifted Children in Teaching Gifted Kids in Today’s Classroom (pdf)

Deep Thinkers & Perfectionists: Getting to Know Your Gifted Teen

A Parent’s Guide to Gifted Teens: Living with Intense & Creative Adolescents Paperback (Amazon)

Parents of Gifted 3: Promote Sensible Risk-taking

Life Balance & Gifted Teens – an Oxymoron?

Sleep Deprivation and Teens

Exploring the Duality of the Gifted Teen

The Gifted Teen Survival Guide: Smart, Sharp & Ready for (Almost) Anything (Amazon)

Cybraryman’s Asynchronous Development Page

Graphic courtesy of Lisa Conrad.

Posted in gifted, gifted and talented, Teens, Twice-exceptional, Underachievement

The Intensity of Giftedness with Guest, Dr. Lynette Breedlove

Nov 25

Posted by gtchatmod

Lynette Breedlove, Ph.D.

Dr.Lynette Breedlove, Director of The Carol Martin Gatton Academy of Mathematics and Science and Past President of TAGT, joined us this week to discuss the Intensity of Giftedness. Lynette will be conducting two Pre-Conference Sessions as well as presenting at this year’s TAGT Annual Conference in Fort Worth, Texas in December.

It was immediately apparent when asked what intensity looked like in gifted children that most participants at this chat had extensive experience identifying intensity. It was also noted that asynchronous development played an important role in shaping gifted children’s personalities. Dr. Breedlove explained, “When you are more sensitive and aware than others, you pick up on even slight differences in yourself and others. Most children are concerned about being different and intensity makes it a bigger deal to the child. The interplay between intensity and asynchrony makes things very complicated for students.”

A gifted child’s strong affective memory can cause problems in the school environment. Memories can seem so real that the child may feel they’re re-living painful past experiences; sometimes over and over again. Teachers, counselors, administrators should learn about and understand these intense feelings; not try to minimize them. Lynette reminded us, “Students can have emotional reactions that seem unrelated to what’s happening in the classroom at the moment – tied to a previous experience. You can’t rely on students forgetting something to help them move on or get over it. It is extremely important that parents, teachers, and counselors LISTEN and HONOR the students’ feelings.”

The remainder of the chat centered on how parents and educators can work with gifted children to minimize negative experiences and redirect behavior toward positive outcomes. A full transcript may be found here.

Global #gtchat Powered by the Texas Association for the Gifted and Talented is a weekly chat on Twitter. Join us Fridays at 7/6 C & 4 PT in the U.S., midnight in the UK and Saturdays 1 PM NZ/11 AM AEDT to discuss current topics in the gifted community and meet experts in the field. Transcripts of our weekly chats can be found at Storify. Our Facebook Pageprovides information on the chat and news & information regarding the gifted community.

Links:

Excitabilities and Gifted People (YouTube 7:54)

Emotional Intensity in Gifted Children by Leslie Sword at SENG

Intense Behaviors of the Gifted: Possible Roadblocks to Academic Achievement

Breathing in I Calm My Body: Intensities in the Gifted from the Institute for Educational Advancement

Tips for Working with Emotional Intensity by Christine Fonseca

Emotional Intensity

Emotional Sensitivities and Intensities of Gifted Children (pdf)

Gifted Intensities: Liability or Asset? (pdf) by Lori Comallie-Caplan

Intensity & the Highly Gifted & Highly Sensitive Person

Living with Intensity by Dr. Susan Daniels and Dr. Michael Piechowski

Being an Emotional Coach to Gifted Children (SlideShare) by Christine Fonseca via @Giftedkidsie